Annoyed

I have been feeling annoyed all day...I am not sure why or at who:
1. Went to yoga, was very relaxed and breathing and all that good stuff, then I picked up Emy to go to the pool and swim, we are in for about 10 minutes and a child throws up in the pool. So they close the pool. I am annoyed at this child. (I know what you are thinking, I am a bad person, I already know this)
2. Put on a bikini...need I say more?
3. Kennedy is walking around the house whistling. I know, good for her, she can whistle. Bad for me that I think it is annoying. I let her whistle for about 15 minutes (very generous, I think) and then I have to ask her to stop, or go into her room (door closed). (again, I know what you are thinking...)
4. Corey "goes to work" today and really he gets to go and play golf. I would love to "go to work" and then really go to a spa all day. Oh, yes, it is really only annoying because this is like the 5th time in 2 weeks that it has happened. (just stop your thinking, I already know!!!)
Thats all I can say.

Love

If what we call love doesn't take us beyond ourselves, it is not really love. If we have the idea that love is characterized as cautious, wise, sensible, shrewd, and never taken to extremes, we have missed the true meaning. This may describe affection, and it may bring us a warm feeling, but it is not a true and accurate description of love.

I like this... Thanks to a good friend

Life is a story. This is true for every soul.
It is a love story, I assure you. But it is set in the midst of a life and death battle. That is why it seems so hard.
The story of your life is the story of the journey of your heart through a dangerous and beautiful world. It is the story of the long and sustained assault on your heart by the Enemy who knows who you could be and fears you.
But it is also the story of the long and mysterious pursuit of your heart by the God who knows you truly and loves you deeply.

it is hard to breathe

I am not sure what is going on with me. I cannot breathe. I cannot get past the ache in my throat to even swallow correctly I cannot lay next to my husband, with my hand over his chest, feeling that strong heartbeat, without crying. I didn't even know you could cry while you were sleeping. Yet I wake up and my pillow is wet. and i pray and pray and pray for a woman i do not even know. Amy.

What I really think

I really think that Emy will go to school and begin counting "5 6 7 8" (she goes to way more cheerleading practices than is needed for a 3 year old)
I really think that Mac is the sweetest boy I know. Seriously now, not all boys are sweet. He still amazes me.
I really think that Kennedy is growing up too fast!!!! Even her bathing suit for this year came with little pads in the bra!!! What is up with that? Like 9 year olds need some padding????
I really think I operate better when my life is busy. For the last 4 days, things have been slow and I have been sssooooo LAZY!!!
I really think my husband is the greatest. He had a chance to spend a $250.00 gift card to Bass Pro Shops on himself (hello) and instead he bought each child something and our family a new grill and himself a watch (that he thought was $50.00, but then only rang up 25) I LOVE HIM!!!
I really think that I am glad my children are all strong willed...even if I don't think so later.

Emy received her first spanking today... she climbed on the counter and got into a bowl (that was on top of the fridge!!!) and got a candy bar out. Then, she brings it to me and I say No. And she takes it into Kennedy's room and eats it anyway. Little devil.
Mac got off the bus in tears...his clip was moved to yellow (the warning mode) This is his explanation "well, it was an accident, I mean I accidently did it and it wasn't on purpose...I pinched 2 people" Who is my sweet child?
Kennedy said "do I always have to tell you who I like and who likes me?" And I say yes, that is the 13th commandment.

the amazing race

I know I have a lot to catch up on, but I am only going to start at Monday... so much has already happened since then, that you can just duplicate it times the amount of weeks I have not posted and that is my life...
I flew in from LA on the red eye (via Atlanta for some reason) and arrived in Jackson at 10:00 am. I did not lseep on my flight because I had 2 crying babies sitting behind me. I struggled to think semi-non evil thoughts and may have dozed...but certainly sleep would be way to generous of a word to use. I had practice at 3:00, and private at 5:00, Kennedy had practice at 6:00 and I had team practice 6-8. Nice night.
Tuesday I taught kickboxing and weight training from 9-10:45 and then went to the store for groceries and then home for 2 hours before I left for practice at 3:30-5:00 and a private at 5:00 and 6:00. Oh right and Mac had practice at 4:00 and Kennedy had practice at 6:00. Corey took all 3 kids to their functions. AND to top it off it is Valentines day and I have bought my husband a bag of chewy sweet tarts (which are his favorite) but they seem a little minimal after he presented me with roses and candles at 8:00am!!!! So I think, okay I am going to get the kids Chick fil a for dinner and I ordered nice steak dinners for us and I bought a bottle of wine. The plan: feed the kids, put them in bed and have romantic candle lit dinner with cute husband. What actually happened: I picked up dinner and then after placing it in my van, shut the sliding door on my middle finger!!!! I mean it is stuck and I actually have to open the door to get it out. I look and see blood. Okay, well nothing to do except get in the car and drive home! So I get home (side note: in the car I am alternating crying and screaming with yelling at myself to stop being a baby...rather funny) and our neighbor who is a nurse says: you need to go to the ER. So we drop the kids (and their dinner) off at a friends house and drive to the ER. We then spend the next 5 hours in the ER (yes, we left at 12:30) and they find out it is not broken, but I need sticthes and a possible tendon severed. Great. So he makes an appt with a hand surgeon and then tells me NO EATING until my appt the next morning. Okay, I go home, go to bed (while my husband eats his dinner)
Wednesday: Get to doctors office at 8:00am as directed only to find out doctor is not coming in until 10:00. So I sit there (starving...I would make a horrible anorexic) until he sees me at 10:15. Good news my tendon is crushed! (yes apparently that is good news) so no surgery this day, but we will see how it goes until next Thursday. Okay, then I go to practice at 3:30-5:00 go home, take Kennedy to church (Corey takes Mac and Emy to soccer) and I go to team practice 6:30-8:15. At 7:30 when Kennedy is through at church Corey is going to pick her up. So at 8:10 I get a phone call from the church "UM, your daughter is still here..." So I call Corey (who is at home) and he says "oh, I forgot!" So I left practice and went to pick her up.
Thursday: Teach kickboxing and weight training with a finger that doesn't work. and then come home to madly clean (someone is coming to look at the house at 3:15 and I haven't even unpacked my suitcase from my trip to LA). Get Mac to practice at 4:00... oops forgot his shoes, drive home and get those. Then go look at prospect house at 5:00 and then we are off. Kennedy has practice at 6:00, Corey has practice at 6:00 and I have cheer practice at 6:00. So I am madly driving Kennedy to practice, when I look up and see a little white car about 6 cars ahead of me. I think "that looks like Corey's car" and I am talking to him on the phone, so I say where are you and he confirms that he is indeed on the same road and I say Your practice was supposed to be at BC and he says it changed to Shiloh and that is where Kennedy's is....whoa. So I say (loudly) then why am I taking Kennedy to Shiloh???????? Anyway, I am going to my practice (late) and then Corey is going to a dinner at BC and Kennedy is riding home wioth a friends.
Okay, so if that doesn't make you tired....you have no children!!!!

Hercules

I will beat the odds
I can go the distance
I will face the world
Fearless, proud and strong
I will please my God
I can go the distance
Till I find my hero's welcome
Right where I belong.

Get Away Car

Right,
kids can be crazy and uncontrollable and messy and certainly dirty:
but sweet and loving and so completely forgiving
that why would any sane person want to drive fast and far?
Yes,
husbands can be unruly and decisive and tempermental and emotionally draining:
but supportive and loving and so completely filling
that why would any sane person want to drive fast and far?
Sure,
friends can be tiring and obsessive and complicated and problematic and conditionally present:
but silent and loving and so completely necessary
that why would any sane person want to drive fast and far?

"I need a get away car, I got to get out of here fast and far"

All things Hawaii

Ancient Hawaiians had no music.
They used chants to tell the stories of old time and pass on the history of the people. The dancers never smiled. They bent their knees low to absorb the mana (strength, spiritual energy) from the earth.

Hula is something that comes out of the deep place in your heart when you listen to the poetry (mele). You listen to the mele, and then you move in a way that gracefully interprets that truth.

Aloha= Alo means presence or literally "in the face"
ha means breath or spirit
Aloha: to breathe into the face or share spirit with one another.

Aloha friends!!!!

Macguire

Sometimes when I get a glimpse of him I see this boy. Not my baby son, but this boy who is swiftly growing into a little man. His feet are growing. I always notice this first. He still has small feet for his age, but they seem big to me. Next are his hands, then seem longer and stronger and I know he is growing. After that I see that his one little tooth is loose! And someday soon, it will fall out and then many more will follow. I can see it in his actions, the things he says and what he chooses to do. I can hear it in his voice "Mama, Santa is not real" and he states this so plainly and matter of fact that I cannot even contradict him. He has a little man haircut and he is actually becoming concerned about how he looks. But oh, he is so sweet. He tells me daily how beautiful I am (good son), and how much he loves me. He can still fit on my lap and comes to me consistently. His motto is "Girls go first" even though he is outnumbered in our home. He has a nice smell and I am sure one day someone else will love that about him. My forever son, Mac

My Butt

My butt is big
and round like the letter C
and ten thousand lunges
have made it rounder
but not smaller
and that's just fine.
It's a space heater
for my side of the bed
it's my ambassador
to those who walk behind me
it's a border collie
that herds skinny women
away from the best deals
at clothing sales.
My butt is big
and that's just fine
and those who might scorn it
are invited to kiss it.
Just do it.

Day 2

Day 2 of Kennedy being sick! Yesterday she woke up saying her tummy hurt...of course being the great mom I am, I told her to go to the bathroom and go to school. About 1 1/2 hours later she called from school crying "My head hurts so bad" so I went and picked her up. She felt bad, but no temperature or anything. So I drugged her and put her to bed. She complained off and on of aches and pains, but nothing major. Last night I went to practice and Corey calls me and says "Her temperature is 104" So I stop at the store, get some meds and come home. She is complaining of headache and stomach ache and crying etc... I sleep in her room (she wakes up 5 times) and finally at 4:00 am, she throws up. Anyway, today she has low temp (100) and has thrown up once. But she is also saying her legs ache and her back is sore etc...
So, day 2 of me being at home all day. Of course, I had plans...I rarely do not have plans. Everything has changed so that I can lay around with my 9 year old. She is precious. Who cares about coaching and teaching kickboxing and making 150 Christmas cards for paying clients (due by Thursday)...my "baby" is sick.

Some things I liked on my trip

When I was driving into Atlanta and it was dark, I looked into the sky and saw the lights of 5 airplanes backed up one after another. It was cool.
A friend shared an intensely personal story with me, and I cried. I listened to Molly and Doug's cd and cried. I wondered if I am passionate about anything anymore. Well, I am passionate about my family, that is a good thing, but what else is driving me? When I listen to some of the songs, I think that so much of marriage is passion. At least in the beginning. And then what happens? A settling? Other "distractions" that take away your thoughts for your passion?
Seeing my sister-in-law with a tattoo, talking to her about "real" stuff, her perfume that smells so great (Ralph Lauren Blue).
My own children behaving and actually acting decent the whole time we were gone!
A fun (unexpected) snowfall one day and the kids building a snowman. (Emy's first time to see snow)

High and Low

I had a friend who would play the high low game at the dinner table, so that they would get to talking about their days and they could relate to each other. So: my low today...4:45 AM my daughter waking me up because she was throwing up. My high today 8:35 PM watching a star literally fall from the sky. Breathtaking.
Molly: low- cold shower only available in the morning high- husband who lets you take the first one!

The Low Down

Candy is good!
I love tootsie rolls, but they have to be the long thin ones, isn't that strange. I think the fat ones are gross!
Corey and I could come to blows over Mini chewy sweet tarts! We both love them and we (as a parental pre-caution) have already confiscated them from the kids bags. Although I really do not like the orange ones. They taste like baby aspirin. But truly I have an aversion to all things orange, food wise that is. It is not my greatest flavor.
The kids were adorable and they had fun. Emy was amazed that all she had to do was ring a door bell and people would shove candy into her bag! She will probably try it every night, just to make sure...
I like all the name brand chocolates: Hershey, twix, baby ruth...but who eats almond joy??? I mean what child eats chocolate and coconut and a big fat almond in the center??? I threw these away.
I like star bursts and now and laters, but who really eats Dots anymore??? And you can totally tell the old folks who package their candy and they are all some sort of chewy thing wrapped in the orange paper...what is that????
Hilarious!

back seat drivers

It is bad enough when your husband has to tell you how to drive, but your 9 year old? Come on! She sits back there and says things like "you can get in the other lane" "you can go faster and still be in the speed limit" "You don't have to slow down that much the light is changing." She is interesting to say the least. An all the while my 2 year old is copying me "come on people, move it!"
Well, after freaking out that Kennedy actually got her first ever B on a report card, she is doing better. She and I have read more together and I have spent some great time with her, doing her homework and helping her out. She really wants to do well, and she tries so hard. She is getting so big in so many ways, and I fear for the days that she will not want me to kiss her or hug her!
Mac was naming the things he liked to do best and after soccer, and running and playing and swimming...he actually said cleaning! I am a little frightened by this, but I guess it will make him a good husband some day.

The Itsy Bitsy Spider

Ha Ha!!!
For Kennedy's class, they were collecting live spiders. They are doing a unit on Charlotte's Web and if they brought in a live spider they could get a 100% on any homework paper. So on Friday morning, Corey found a HUGE spider while he was trying to clean out a web that stretched from the ground and up half the tree. So I got so excited and asked him to catch it so I could take it to Kennedy at school. We took it and Kennedy was so excited that I brought it and I was happy to make her happy.
Well... When she returned home from school I said "Weren't you so excited about the spider?" and she said "Mama, it was poisonous!!!!!!! It was a brown recluse!!!!!" Am I the worst mom in the world??? I am certain to be banned from the school from now on...
Corey wanted to know if she still got a 100%.

13 year marriage

Love, I have come to understand, is more than three words mumbled before bedtime. Love is sustained by action, a pattern of devotion in the things we do for each other every day.

Issues

Just as I am certain I am the only person in the world with issues (or I guess I let them consume me) I am happy to hear that someone else is having the exact same issues. Do you ever wonder how to figure something out, or what to do and just when you cannot stand it anymore someone else says "oh I have that issue too" And even if they have not figured it out, and they have no answers for you, it somehow makes you feel better. Not that you want someone else to suffer, just that you want to feel normal. I will think, no one else knows what this is like, and I must be the only person experiencing this, and then, whammy, someone else is doing it also.
Parenting my friends...what joys!!!

loong time

well it has been a long time since I have posted...I am certain no one is even checking this anymore...
Molly, my sister, is beautiful! We just celebrated her marriage to Doug and it was so lovely. As all of her friends so openly spoke, Molly is truly great inside and out! The wedding was amazing, the ceremony was honest and the fun afterward was exciting. It was great to see a lot of old family friends and to meet new young friends of Doug and Mollys. It was also great meeting my new extended family: Larry April Mark and David. They are a neat, talented and inviting group of people, who I am glad to be related to.
The entire week was filled with family and friends and the sense of home. I love fall in Ohio!!! Especially out on the farm. What a great week. It feels like a let down to come home...except to see Corey!!! We missed him so much and the kids were ecstatic to see him.
So now, the "dailies" take over and life moves along, yet I am ever remembering the great fun from last week and the special people who are in my thoughts and prayers.